December 23, 2012

Preparing for the move

Preparing to move

Bretagne -
Preparing for the next chapter of my life is not just about preparing the practicalities, looking up a school, preparing the visa, getting a new passport, deciding where to move (which city that is), deciding what to bring, how to ship it, what to put into storage, what to get rid of and how to work everything out at home.

Preparing for a move is also about saying farewell to family and friends that it may take time before I see again, and it is about saying farewell to familiar places, as well as realising that there are places I want to see but won't be able to get to in a while, because once I have travelled on, once I have left Düsseldorf behind, and stopped working to study, then I will not be able to pop over to Gothenburg for a weekend, nor will I be able to take the train over to Paris, pop over to London, get on the plane and go to Zürich for a weekend.

December 06, 2012

So what IS my decision then?

As mentioned in the previous post, the thought process started with my broken foot.
It continued with me listing what I was interested in, and what I wanted to do, as well as what I was missing, and I came to the conclusion that is was time to do something about it - the one thing I regret so far is that I haven't studied more languages, I want to communicate with people, I want to see and do more in the world, and therefore, languages are the one thing that I really miss - I do speak fluently English and Swedish, I speak German, I can speak French (although don't ask me about grammar, my grammar is not very good, even if my pronunciation is said to be - but I am working on that), I understand some Spanish (and I speak a bit too, enough to get buy as a tourist), Danish and Norwegian is not an issue. But I didn't study enough languages. I want to fix that.
Hong Kong island, November
Also, I have been in Germany for a number of years, and although I love it, things are starting to go a little bit too much routine, and I am also starting to feel restless, something I think I may have mentioned before. Düsseldorf is a great city, I have a great network of friends, and I enjoy what I do here, but there is something missing.  Things are becoming a bit too much routine, I know where to find people on Wednesdays, I know what is going on every third Thursday of the month, I arrange my events, I go to similar events again again and again. It is great events and it is fun, but I know pretty well what is going to happen and who is going to be there.

December 04, 2012

How the thought process started

What triggered it all?

The first of May 2012 I went to the hospital after having had pain in a foot for weeks. It was not getting better, but rather worse - more and more swollen, and it got more and more difficult to walk on it. The doctor took one look at it, it was X-rayed, and it was confirmed that it was broken.
Coffee, a part of the thought process
I was given crutches and told to go home and rest. To me it was a disaster, or so I thought - I have never been known for sitting still, I love to move and I live a very active life. Now, the broken foot didn't quite immobilise me, I was simply too restless (and far to worried about deep vein thrombosis) to just sit still, but it definitely forced me to be more still than normal. And that's when the route towards what could be considered my new life started...

During the weeks after I was diagnosed, and also the weeks after I got of the crutches but still had to take it easy, I started to think. I was contemplating life as it is, I was thinking about what I have done and about what I want to do next. I was pondering what was and is important to me, and how life has changes, because (thankfully!) it has, I am no longer the same person I was five years ago, or not even  the same I was two years ago - with new experiences comes new development.

And while I have had a really great life up until now, there are definitely things that I am curious about, things I want to see and do. I am also not a person who will just settle down and be satisfied with what I have, I do need to keep on developing and I do need to keep on moving, learning about myself, and learning. It is what I am and it is what I do.